The theory of accumulation

Of junk that is.

Been packing all the stuff in my house over the week. Since I’m moving out for a year while my house gets rebuilt from the ground up.

At first, I thought: Well it can’t take that long to pack.

This is one of the few moments that I get it wrong.

So yes, today, I formulate my theory of accumulation. Below is my extremely short thesis.

The law of accumulation states that all matter of a junk-like nature has a tendency to increase at an exponential rate. Here ‘junk’ is defined as matter which can be disposed of without making the owner worse off.

Empirical evidence has proven that the mass of junk has a positive correlation with the number of years of accumulation, following the formula:

f(x) = alnx , where f(x) V

where a is the initial amount of junk, x is the number of years of accumulation, and V is the unoccupied volume of the house after furnishing.

However researchers are still debating over the reason behind this phenomenon.

One proposed theory seeks to link longevity of residence to an increased disinclination to dispose junk.

Another theory claims that sedentary activity is the factor behind the initial presence of junk, which in turn feeds into a vicious cycle called the “sedentary accumulation effect”, whereby laziness creates junk, which creates more laziness as residents become increasingly discouraged by the increased effort required to remove the junk, leading to the accumulation of more junk over time.

There is yet another school of thought which reasons that junk is allowed to accumulate due to the ‘live-in’ factor it gives a residence, as a certain mass of junk denotes settled residents. This leads to benefits such as reduced echo as empty space becomes occupied, improving communication between residents. It also gives a psychological feel of security, as a sense of permanency is created by the unmovability of junk.

But there are long term cost. When the residents have to move out of the house, the sheer accumulation of junk is not only time consuming, but requires a large mental effort in order to discern what is ‘junk’ and what is ‘not junk disguised as junk’. This leads to much consternation and lack of sleep, whereby wrong decisions will lead to future regret or muscle strain due to the unnecessary weight.

So what are the proposed cures, if this really is seen as a problem? Some propose not allowing the junk to accumulate. Some feel that labelling junk as ‘junk’ may help facilitate the packing process. Yet others just say: Don’t move out!

This has been yet another random musing. Hope you enjoyed reading it.

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4 responses to “The theory of accumulation

  1. I told you that it’ll take a while.

  2. maybe u shld call yeself weng2 or wengjr. i was here first =)

  3. Lol. Then call urself weng 1 or weng senior.

  4. don’t confuse your visitors =)anyways by default, the first does not need to affix ‘1’ because it is implicitly implied that he IS the first by way of not needing to affix the ‘1’. It’s an identity statement.

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